Communicating with young children the Montessori way

Proactive guidance refers to communication strategies that many Montessori teachers have found effective because the goal is to guide not to force children in positive ways as they develop. Instead of deciding how the child will develop, teachers at Great Minds Early Childhood Center act as guides for children. Using proactive guidance strategies rather than praise or punishment, the teachers communicate to the children when they are not acting suitably, compliment them when they are and show them that there are many alternatives to unsuitable behavior. These are some examples of ways the teachers at Great Minds ECC recommend to parents and use themselves to communicate what is suitable behavior to young children:  

• Let the children know that you notice and appreciate their suitable behaviour. When the child behaves suitably, use positive interaction, a communication strategy consisting of quiet, simple statements or physical responses that let a child know that she has been noticed and acknowledged. Positive interaction does not involve cheering and clapping or reward and punishment. The reinforcement can be as simple as a smile or a quiet observation, such as “ I see you put that mat aways James” or “ Amid you are turning those pages very carefully” or “ Ben I hear how quietly you closed that door”.
• Communicate to the children that cooperative behavior, not competition, is the norm. Do not encourage children to run races or to be the first in line.
• Make every effort not to reward unsuitable behavior with direct attention. For example, try not to react immediately when a child screams in anger or throws herself on the floor in a rage. Instead, acknowledge the behaviour and help the child identify the feelings behind it : “ I hear than you are feeling angry” or “ I see that you are crying. Are you feeling sad?” Then calmly look for opportunities to direct the child to more suitable behavior.
• Show the children that playing cooperatively can be fun. Develop a repertoire of constructive cooperative games and play them regularly with children.
• Intervene gently, quietly and only when necessary. Unless there is a danger, wait before intervening and give children time to solve their own problems. If possible prevent unsuitable behaviors by gently and quietly distracting or directing. Another proactive guidance strategy, referred to as gluing, involves keeping a child who is restless or disturbing others close by for a short period of time until is ready again to work and move independently.
• Give a direct choice by offering the child the opportunity to choose between two equally attractive and positive actions or objects. This way of communicating shows the child that you have confidence in her ability to make choices and gives her experience in expressing preferences. E.g. “ Do you want to read a book or draw a picture?”
• Slow down. Moving slowly and carefully both slows the caregiver to the pace of the child, who tend to look at and examine everything, and models careful and safe movement for everyone in the childcare environment. Carrying items carefully, one at a time, in both hands is a great way to communicate careful and safe movement.
• Speak and listen with respect. Speaking and listening with respect is an important part of communicating with children. Some of the ways Great Minds ECC teachers use and also recommend to the caregivers are to show respect to children include speaking slowly and quietly, bending down to the child’s level, using proper and not “baby talk” words, listening without interruption and always asking for permission to take or move something the child is handling.
• Use non-verbal signal for quiet and stopping. Most Montessori teachers  work out non verbal signals for quiet and for stopping to communicate quickly with children. For example in the outdoor play area 2 year old Ahmed picks up a sharp stick from a small tree and runs with it. His teacher claps her hands loudly twice. Because the teacher has presented lessons showing that two loud claps always mean “stop now” Ahmed stops.

Read Part 2 here .